You Dating App Just Matched You With Someone You Know. Now What?

You’re swiping through Tinder and then you see a familiar face. We’ve all been there…

by Amy North

Maybe it’s a friend, someone from work, or a guy you always see on the bus.

You swipe right and you match!

It feels amazing…for about two seconds. Then your head fills with questions.

Does he remember me? Is this going to make the bus, or the bar, or the coffeeshop really awkward? What’s my next move?

I’ll tell you exactly what to do if you match with someone you know on Tinder.

Tinder is supposed to be for meeting new people, but it can also be a way to connect with people you already know. In fact, some of the best relationships start this way.

Even if he likes you and wants to ask you out, many guys won’t even flirt with girls they know in real life.

Many guys don’t want to make girls uncomfortable or risk being shut down by getting too familiar with friends or even friends of friends.

And it’s not always easy to know if there’s mutual attraction and if you’re both single and looking.

In fact there are plenty of people who only date people they meet off tinder to minimize the risk of rejection and embarrassment or to avoid being skeezy.

For the right guy, this match can act as a sort of green light to ask you out.

How great is that?

If you’re not interested, or you decide you don’t want to risk an awkward date leading to an awkward Monday morning meeting, then don’t worry about it. Chances are he won’t give it a second thought.

If he does message you then just explain that you think he’s cute but you don’t want to date someone you work with. This is something guys definitely understand.

But if you are interested in moving forward, what do you do next? There are a few options here.

You can wait for him to message you first.

This can be a good strategy. If you like a guy who is confident and take charge then you don’t want to be the one to make the first move.

I don’t think I have to tell you how to wait but I will tell you to do your best to simply forget it ever happened.

Don’t stress if he doesn’t say anything to you. You can even wait to run into him and enjoy the sexual tension in the air now that you share this secret.

Send him a text

If you have his number then this is a great way to say “I’m more than just a tinder match.

If you don’t have something funny to say then try to make your first message a question that seems genuine and interesting.

Here are some guidelines to texting that should get you started.

You’re trying to spark conversation. What it’s about doesn’t really matter. Even if you message him about his dental records, if you reach out to him a couple days after you match on Tinder, he’s going to get the message that you’re interested.

Drawing a blank? I’ve got the answer. My free video presentation gives you the tools you need to learn to send the texts that guys want to get. You’ll have him checking his phone every two seconds, waiting to hear from you.

Send him a tinder message

There are a few things you should keep in mind. First off, Tinder and texting are totally different.

I’d go for the message right away rather than waiting. The instant message will convey that this isn’t a big deal for you and that you think the whole thing is funny.

Start with a joke or a reference to something you know about him in real life.

Even just a simple “lol” can be a great move. It shows him that you’re aware that this is a bit awkward and that that doesn’t bother you.

Here are a few other messages you can start off with…

Come here often?

You’re way cuter in person

You’ve got to put a picture of your car/dog/bike/house/hobby on there. That’ll get you way more girls 😉

From then, all you need to do is keep the conversation going. Don’t let it just be a one off.

Keep things going for at least five messages back and forth to show him you’re interested and then let him keep the ball rolling.first date for tinder couple

Trust me when I say this is a great way to start off a relationship with a guy.

It’s got all the benefits of falling for a friend and with the best aspect of tinder: a clear indication of attraction.

Plus it gives you an easy way to lie about how you met if you’re into that kind of thing.

But remember to avoid the emojis that guys hate.

So what if you two talk on tinder and it never goes anywhere or he turns out to be not as cool and funny as you once thought?

Whatever the case, this near miss can lead to some real weird feelings the next time you two run into one another.

What If It Doesn’t Work Out?

First off, don’t avoid him. Say hello when you see him and stop for a quick chat, the way you would with someone you knew from way back but weren’t particularly close to.

You don’t have to talk for an hour but be polite and if he lingers too long then tell him you have to go.

That’s usually all it takes to reset the relationship and get things back into neutral.

Whatever happens, it can be interesting to see someone you know in a different context.

Even if you’re not a good match, it’s good practice to consider more people romantically. You’ll be surprised at how many options you really have.

Amy North is a women’s relationship coach and best-selling author from Vancouver, Canada, with a degree in Social Psychology. Her programs, including Text Chemistry and The Devotion System have helped dozens of women attract and keep the right guy, or improve the relationship they already have. “As your relationship coach I can be your guru, supporter, challenger, and motivator. I’ll give you the push to get going, and the tools to keep you on track. Your interests will be my interests, and I won’t judge, but I will help.”

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