by Virginia Clark
Here’s a question I got from Angela about being single:
I’ve been reading books about relationships and going to seminars for years. It doesn’t seem to have made a difference, I’m still single with no man in sight. What am I doing wrong?
My Single Story
Like Angela, I too looked into everything I could find about relationships and had dismal results for years. I worked so hard to learn how to attract a man, then how to keep his attention and finally how to make him want to marry me. I had absorbed so much advice that it just made me more confused.
All this knowledge was in my head, and I kept it there as I stayed single waited for the right man to come into my life. I saved myself from dating the wrong men and waited patiently for Mr. Right to show himself.
Unfortunately, I didn’t realize that I wasn’t at all prepared to meet the right man. Why not? I hadn’t put what I learned into action and gotten to know what worked for me.
For example, it’s one thing to learn that you need to set boundaries with a man; to know it’s important so you can stick to your values.
But it is a whole other thing to put up a boundary when a man you’re falling in love with is standing in front of you!
The power of his presence can make you forget everything you’ve learned and before you know it you’ve lost your integrity.
I wasn’t willing to go out with men I didn’t think were Mr. Right, and therefore I was totally at a loss when I met a man that excited me.
I became so distracted by my feelings that I didn’t know what to do.
What can you do to avoid this happening to you? Well, there is only one answer…practice, practice, practice.
Don’t Practice Being Single, Practice Relationships
Think about how you learned to ride a bike. Were you able to ride your first bike in just one try? No way.
You fell off a few times as you learned how to peddle. Balancing on a bike is a skill that takes practice, but once learned, is never forgotten.
The same is true with your behavior. If you practice for the first time with a man you really like, most likely you’re going to take a spill.
You have to experiment many times to see how it feels and to recognize what you need to overcome to do it well. Until you do, you won’t be able to trust yourself to do it correctly.
That’s why it’s important to put into action what you’ve learned, even with the men you don’t like. You’ll be able to see what your weaknesses are and work to strengthen yourself in those areas.
One skill I really needed to work on was learning to speak up for myself. Sure, I had read that it was an important thing to do, but until I practiced doing it, I wasn’t able to make it a part of me.
If you, like Angela, feel that you know a lot about relationships but nothing is happening, I suggest you get out there and practice with men what you’ve learned from the experts you’ve been studying.
There is an abundance of advice on how to have a successful relationship, but until you use that advice you won’t be able to make it your own and have it work for you.
If you need more support with this or any relationship problem, take advantage of my 30-MINUTE NO CHARGE PHONE CONSULTATION.
I’m thrilled to be connecting with you here and I welcome your questions and your thoughts.
In the meantime don’t forget, things can change in an instant, don’t lose hope!
Virginia is the real deal. Her story of meeting her man late in life and getting married (she’d never been married before) is amazing, and her ebook “It’s Never Too Late To Marry” will give you the hope you need, step-by-step instructions on how to make it happen for yourself, and the inspiration to transform your love life. Go here to check out Virginia and learn how to make the move from single to relationship->