by Lorrie Kazan
My friend, relationship coach Rori Raye, encourages women to express their feelings, even or especially with the men in their romantic lives.
But, “What if he thinks I’m needy?” you might ask.
“Don’t we have to show men how independent we are so they’ll like us better, get through their fears, and not think we think about them all the time even if we do?”
Expressing vulnerability is not the same as neediness; in fact, it just might be the antithesis.
You’ll have to trust your core self, your ability to relate to yourself and your emotions, and your ability to relate to others in a positive way.
Even if the emotions you’re feeling are anything but positive!
If I realize I’m having a reaction, I can stop and examine what’s going on within me, look at what set it off, and also know that what set me off isn’t necessarily an issue for everybody, but it is an issue for me.
If I own my emotions, I don’t expect anyone else to fix them.
I might like someone to fix how I feel, tell me I’m wonderful and they’ll never leave me, but if I am engaging in an authentic process, then I let go of the results.
In spirituality we say the results are in God’s hands (or you can substitute Higher Power or Universe or any word that doesn’t mean you and your best thinking, or me and mine.)
Owning emotions means I’ve processed my issues before, looked at my part in interactions and taken responsibility for my behavior.
In the moment, I can say that such and such makes me feel sad.
Granted, someone else might not feel sad because their significant other is seeing others, for instance, but that doesn’t work for me.
To be honest about feelings is different from saying, “You’re doing this to me.”
But if I played the game, i.e., kept my mouth shut, played hard to get, made them jealous…Catherine Ponder says, “What you fight to get, you fight to keep.”
What if we didn’t have to fight our way through a relationship but could speak honestly about what we need without trying to force the other person to provide it?
Will he think you’re needy? Does that sound needy or powerful to you?
With Love, Lorrie
Lorrie is an amazing psychic with incredible credentials and track record. If you want to talk with her about anything – go here and learn how you can discover your soulmate relationship->