by Michael Webb
If you want to make sure you and the man you love stay together… Did you know that love does NOT conquer all?
You see, often people get married with the idea that their “chemistry” or undying love for each other will keep them together forever.
However, with almost 50% of marriages ending in divorce these days, it’s obvious that this isn’t the case. Therefore, it pays to know a few little secrets before getting married.
Here Are 5 Tips That Help Couples Stay Together Long After Tying The Knot:
TIP#1 — CONTINUE DATING
Over the years, people often drift apart or relationships and marriages become stale because couples fail to do new and special things together.
That’s why going on new and refreshing dates is so important. In fact, there is something about “dating” that creates a sense of magic in a relationship and can even bring relationships out of a rut.
While on a date, you also put more effort into your appearance, have more uninterrupted time to communicate on a deeper level and are naturally drawn closer together.
Stuck for ideas? Spend the day at the aquarium, zoo, museum, carnival, bookstore, beach or park.
TIP#2 — DELAY IS OFTEN BETTER
It’s a well-documented statistic that couples who have dated for a year or longer before marriage have a significantly lower rate of divorce than those who married after a short dating period.
A year of dating gives time for many emotions to surface and many character traits to be discovered. You may adore a man in the spring, but despise him in the winter.
Getting engaged on the third date isn’t romantic. It’s gambling.
TIP#3 — ALWAYS EXPRESS YOUR LOVE
Oftentimes, as a relationship matures, partners tend to stop praising each other because they “assume” their partner already knows what they’re thinking.
When in reality, a day should never go by without you praising your man. Compliment him on whatever he does well, reaffirm that he’s the greatest man in the world or tell him he’s a wonderful role model. If you want to be loved and romanced by your sweetheart, love and romance him first. When he’s feeling loved, it’s much easier for a man to love you with all of his masculine energy.
When he feels loved, a man will do almost anything to keep the love flowing and make sure you stay together.
Are you a super supporter of what your man does and says? Do you cheer him on and praise him constantly? Or does he always find himself constantly hearing boos or silence?
TIP#4 — TAKE TIME TO UNDERSTAND YOUR MAN
Couples with the most problems are often the ones that say, “I just don’t understand him/her.”
So let me ask you: How knowledgeable are you about your man’s profession or the degree he’s pursuing?
What does he know about YOU?
Do you know anything about each other’s family heritage? Are you able to have a meaningful conversation about his hobby or even his interest in sports?
If your man has no idea what you’re experiencing during PMS or menopause, or you have no idea what his mid-life crisis might be feeling for him – can you share your feelings and experiences with each other so there’s some understanding and passion?
So there’s a better chance you can “get’ each other?
You don’t need to be identical, but make an effort to learn about the things that interest your man in life (and share what floats YOUR boat, too) and you’ll grow closer as a result.
TIP#5 — ANSWER THE *BIG* QUESTIONS
Does your partner want kids? Do you both want careers? Does one of you have a history of spending your way into debt? What about attending church? Or just serious and important things to each of you?
In my opinion, the biggest reason almost half of marriages end in divorce is because couples fail to ask each other the right questions BEFORE they get married.
I guess people think they’ll be able to change their spouses after marriage and everything will be better.
Most Couples Think The Excitement They Had At The Beginning Of The Relationship Will Insure They Stay Together
If you fail to sit down and discuss finances, religion, sex, housing, your future, and other topics in great detail, you could end up with nothing but argument after argument for the rest of your days.
In the end, if you both have completely different views, desires and goals in life, there’s no guarantee that chemistry or “I love you’s” will help you stay together.
Make it your utmost priority to understand each other “inside-out” BEFORE you take that walk down the aisle.
From Sarah: Michael Webb is the author of “1000 Questions For Couples” the most comprehensive book of questions that all couples should ask before getting married. Covering lovemaking, religion, careers, money, children & raising them, household work, personalities, the future and much much more. Go here to learn more that’ll help you thrive as a couple, and make sure you stay together->