Do you agonize over every text?
Having trouble turning a first date into a second?
I’m going to reveal the secret of when to text a guy after your first date and how to keep him interested. Just text him this after your first date and it will all work out.
As the author of the Text Chemistry Program, I’ve discovered which text messages make men excited to see you again and which turn them off.
I don’t normally advocate game playing but right after a first date is a pivotal time and one wrong move could lead to a problem.
How To Text After The First Date
Basically my biggest advice here is don’t overthink it and don’t overdo it. Don’t double text, let him lead the conversation and avoid ambiguity.
Here’s the risk you take by texting too much after the first date.
At this point you’re riding high. You feel connected to this guy and delighted by your great first date. You established a rapport and a way of talking to him, using the phrases that make men go crazy.
But if I know anything it’s that texting and talking in person are completely different. When we text we’re speaking much more briefly than we do in person.
This means that if you try to match that energy of the first date–which is only natural if it went well–then there’s a good chance you’ll overwhelm him.
Men tend to be wary of moving too fast.
If you go from short flirty texts to big long paragraphs then he might start to worry you’re getting too comfortable. This is a red flag for many guys.
Instead, if you keep calm and quiet, you’ll actually make him want you more.
Men are used to pursuing women and so they’ll be comfortable with this dynamic.
Without further ado, here’s the text message you’ve been waiting for…
“I had so much fun last night :)”
Boring, right? Maybe, but at this point this guy knows 100% whether or not he wants to go out again. You just want to let him know that you’re also interested. Send this message in the afternoon the day after your date.
You don’t need to send him a novel, or tell him exactly when and where you want to meet next. Leave that up in the air and let him reach out.
If you’re comfortable and feel confident that the second date is in the bag then feel free to chat a bit more, just play it cool and keep your feelings to yourself for now.
Remember, this time is crucial and texting too much at this stage can do more harm than good.
But what if the date didn’t go that well and you’re looking for a second chance?
In this case, I’d recommend you address the elephant in the room. You want him to know that you know that it was a little awkward but that that was abnormal for you and you want to give it another shot. Say this instead:
“I felt like I was a little off last night but I think you’re great. You up for round two?”
Addressing the awkwardness is a powerful opportunity for connection between the two of you because you’re being vulnerable and honest.
This is refreshing because so many people are trying to project the perfect version of themselves on the first date. If he knows you’re willing to get real then this will show him you’re confident and self aware.
If you’re interested in learning some foolproof texts with a bit more flair, check out my free video presentation now. My Text Chemistry program contains dozens of tailor made text messages that will catch his eye and make him see you in a new light. It really is simple once you get the hang of it.
Amy North is a women’s relationship coach and best-selling author from Vancouver, Canada, with a degree in Social Psychology. Her programs, including Text Chemistry and The Devotion System have helped dozens of women attract and keep the right guy, or improve the relationship they already have. “As your relationship coach I can be your guru, supporter, challenger, and motivator. I’ll give you the push to get going, and the tools to keep you on track. Your interests will be my interests, and I won’t judge, but I will help.”