By Jonathon Aslay
“My boyfriend and I broke up our relationship a few months ago. Since we’ve broken up, I’ve done a few things to upset him including agreeing to go on a date with his fraternity brother and dancing with another guy in front of him. He said he still likes me and misses me, but I’ve done a lot of things that have hurt him. How can I reconcile our relationship and give him a better argument that he should give me another chance?”
You pose a great question and I agree the “give me another chance” is kinda weak.
Ask yourself this, why do you want to go back and has he even given you any indication he wants to go back to relationship with you? Whatever broke you up in the first place, is there a way to repair it?
If you feel an apology is necessary, here you go.
Apologizing in Your Relationship
The makings of a good apology has 3 components and I am a big fan of the 3 R’s: Regret, Responsibility and Remedy
Trust me, I am no stranger to apology and I have learned first hand the value of these 3 R’s (just ask my g/f). As a relationship coach faced with similar questions, I have found that a good apology goes a long way.
For an apology to be effective, you must be clear you accept full responsibility for your action and inaction and agree to do whatever it takes for your b/f to feel safe to rebuild trust and then make sure you follow through.
A Relationship of Responsibility and Trust
Seeking forgiveness is the first step of the healing process,” I am sorry my actions hurt you, I know what I did was wrong and what do you need to feel safe again” and I want to rebuild the relationship.
If your ex b/f loves you and wants to work it out, suggest a remedy that meets his expectations and respond in a loving way. It takes courage to step up and take responsibility for your actions, to say “I’m sorry” and to be willing to remedy the hurt you have caused.
Men are really easy and if they truly like you and want you, even when they are hurt if you are that special girl he will find it in his heart to forgive and take you back.
Wishing you luck and all the best
Guy Spy into the Male Mind
From The Editors: Jonathon KNOWS the male brain. He coaches women on how to “choose better” when it comes to men, and he has a huge following. We just LOVE him and know you’ll love his free tips, too – so go here to find out how you can succeed in your relationship->