by Susie Collins
“There’s so much love in your heart that you could heal the entire planet. But just for now let us use this love to heal you…. Let this begin to change the way you think and talk about yourself.”
If this speaks to you on one level or another (as it does for most of us), here are some ideas that are helping me and my clients feel more confident, more self-assured and more loved…
1. Feed yourself first and recognize when you’re being offered food.
As women, most of us were taught pretty early to put all others’ wants and desires (especially those we love) above ours and put ourselves last.
Well, the problem with that is that it doesn’t take long for us to have nothing left to give.
We get exhausted doing it all.
But since we’ve been programmed to do it all, we seem to think we have to be strong
and just muscle through whatever it is without needing, asking for or even recognizing help–even when it smacks us in the face.
One woman I coached told me that her husband didn’t give her the attention, love or
support that she wanted.
As we talked, it turned out that just that week he had asked her what she wanted to do for her birthday and she had told him to go ahead and be with his kids from his previous marriage that day instead of her.
She missed a wonderful opportunity to receive his offer of support and love.
So be on the look-out for ways that people offer support or maybe you could ask for
support that you are not presently receiving.
2. Focus your thoughts.
When your thoughts go to how you can’t do anything right, you’re not loved, you’re not as good as someone else…
It’s time to take matters in hand and focus your thoughts.
One way to do that is to make a list of 5 to 10 things that you appreciate about yourself!
You can make your list on paper, in your mind, or say it out loud. This technique will work to help break the negative trance in which you may be locked.
3. Distract yourself.
If you absolutely can’t re-focus your negative thoughts, distract yourself.
Remember how you distracted your children when they were toddlers to keep them from getting into a lot of places where they could get hurt?
Get out and take a walk, read a book or take a bath while listening to some relaxing music.
Above all, don’t beat yourself up!
I invite you to take an active step to claiming your power, your peace, your radiance and love for yourself and for others.
My loving best to you,
Susie and Otto Collins offer great relationship and marriage advice on their site. You can read more and sign up for their monthly newsletter here.