Is He Withdrawing? Here’s What To Do

I’ve talked with so many women who’ve shared their guy is pulling away, and they don’t know what to do to pull him close again.

by Jen Michelle

What an important subject this is, perhaps now more than ever.

If you’re dating and feel like it’s just leading to disappointment or in a relationship where he’s gone quiet and dark, you’re not alone!

So I want to take some time to talk about what exactly a woman can do when a man has disappeared, dropped off, or changed behaviors.

When a man withdraws, it feels like a critical situation.

When you as a woman feel the lack of love and connection flowing towards you, this sets off alarms within your entire system.

Once you sense this shift, you’ll want to know what exactly to do and not to do as it can really be make or break.

Most women are deeply sensitive and in tune to when a man is pulling away energetically.

You’ll sense a shift, and it’s so hard to know what to do in terms of how to pull him close again.

If you’re anything like most women, you’ll find yourself reacting to the discomfort and tension that you’re feeling inside.

Three Ways To Deal With A Withdrawn Man

1. Create Lots of Breathing Room

Men heal through having time and space women heal by talking through feelings. There is room for both, but feminine energy is about timing, knowing when it’s the right time to share something, and knowing when it’s just not going to be heard.

One of the biggest mistakes I see is women talking about what’s changed when he’s not in a space to hear it. She’ll be sharing what she’s feeling in hopes to trigger a connection, but in his mind he only hears that he’s not making you happy, triggering him to withdraw further.

If a man’s showing up cold, withdrawn, or has disappeared, he’s not in a space to hear or have motivation to fix how you’re feeling.

When you give him lots of breathing room though, he feels the freedom and space he needs to work through his emotions, reflect deeper, and miss your feminine presence.

2. Take Responsibility For Your Vibe

I know how hard it is when he’s behaving in a way that feels cold, aloof, or has just disappeared all together.

It can feel like there’s no reason to look put together, get out of the house, or do anything outside of waiting to figure out what’s going on with him.

It’s when you do the opposite – choosing to honor yourself first – that things will start to move in the direction you want.

When you start living your life fully, he feels this shift whether he’s in your life right now or not.

When you find yourself waiting to feel better based on seeing what he’s going to do next, it’ll feel like you’re waiting forever.

Yet when you get the focus on cleaning up your vibe, making yourself happy, and feeling good, he picks up on this too.

When you align yourself with feeling good, looking good, and raising your vibration, you create the best chance of attracting a man back or drawing an even better one into your life.

3. Be Warm and Inviting When He Does Come Back

When a woman has raised her vibration and is feeling good, it’s much easier to be warm and inviting when a man does show back up.

If she’s been waiting and feeling upset or low, it’s much harder to do this authentically.

If a woman has been feeling bad and waiting on him far longer than she feels comfortable with, and he then tries to reach out, it’s likely going to take all of her strength to not release all of those emotions on him.

If this happens, he’s then most likely going to fade away again, so you want to incorporate steps one and two so you can share with this man in a way he can hear and pull him close again.

This doesn’t mean you can’t share what you’re feeling, yet it’s about how you share what you’re feeling, creating emotional safety and conveying warmth so he can hear you, choose to stay, and come up with a solution.

Example of what not to do:

“What took you so long? Your behavior is so immature and completely unacceptable.”


“It feels really good to hear from you. I’ve felt confused and want to better understand what’s been going on.”

Option two is much more likely to support what you DO want. Option one is going to make him defensive and more likely to withdraw again.

When a woman learns how to access the power of her feminine, she realizes one catches more bees with honey, not in trying to break into the actual hive itself.

“As a Certified Relationship Coach with a Masters in Social Work, my passion is helping my clients figure out what’s not working in their relationship and their lives and getting them back on track. I have techniques, scripts and personal experience that you can learn from and use to turn your love life around to find and keep the man of your dreams.”
“When He Walks Through The Door” applies to any stage of love, whether you’re dating, in a new relationship, or want to attract a man back!

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