So – what’s the most important thing in solving your relationship woes? Communication.
That’s right, if you don’t have a good communication in a relationship, then you’ve got nothing.
You can have all the attraction and chemistry in the world – but that will fade incredibly quickly if you can’t talk to each other in a deep, meaningful way that KEEPS the attraction going.
And it’s FUN!!
One of the best ways to start moving towards a more sexually fulfilling relationship is to open the lines of communication between the 2 of you, know each other again, and find out how fun it is to talk to one another. It can be done if you just set your mind to it and know how.
One of the best ways you can open the lines of communication between you and your man is to use questions. By asking questions, you’re allowing him to express himself freely.
You may also be surprised by what you discover about him that you never knew before.
The thing is – we women are great at asking questions – but usually the WRONG questions! We ask “relationship” questions. We ask how he “feels” about us. And that just drives him further away.
Even if you’ve been together for 20 years, you don’t know everything about your partner and it might be a lot of fun to find out.
Now, a word of caution – once you start asking questions, make sure you don’t turn these questions into a chore.
Communication Shouldn’t Feel Like “Work”
Don’t ask all your questions all at once, don’t pepper him with questions, don’t make it a project or a mission – and don’t make it “important.”
The last thing you want to do is pressure a man even more.
Communication is about relieving pressure – not adding to it!
What works in our own heads is to make a game of it.
A fun idea of how to do this is to send him one first by email or text. Something that has nothing to do with your relationship or work, or anything he’s used to hearing. Make it about something you both read or watched on TV together the night before. Make it about the dog or the cat or something funny you thought of – something about the town he grew up in, or the music he likes….
Be creative in letting your ind wander around these things. What’ll happen is, you’ll develop an actual INTEREST in him!
It’s a totally fun way to get you to open up to each other. It’s an important step to fix what ever’s falling flat in your relationship – and it’s a quick cure for communication mistakes, mis-steps, confusions, and obstacles you’re trying to work through with your man.
I’m going to recommend here getting Michael Webb’s book – “1000 Questions for Couples,” and using the questions in the book as a communication booster between you and your man. They’re already written out – so MANY of them – so your imagination will get “jogged” and you won’t feel pressured to come up with ideas for questions that are fun and easy and will HELP.
Communication seems like a “dry,” uninteresting and unsexy thing to work on in a relationship – but truly – it’s the key to everything else. When you work simply to improve the communication within your relationship, you’ll see true improvement in all other aspects of it as well.
From Sarah – Okay – this is different – this great book is not so much “advice” as terrific things to ask your man that open up lines of communication – and Michael does give you advice about how to ask the questions – and why you’re doing it! It’s actually a masterful idea – I’m shocked Michael’s the only one who wrote something like this – but he is! – and he’s “Oprah’s Expert” and we really love the way he writes. Go here to check out 1000 Questions for Couples->