by Susie and Otto Collins
Did you know that couples who stay in love seem to actually talk to each other differently throughout their relationship than couples who are headed for divorce court?
Not only do these couples talk to each other differently, but they also use different words than the rest of us when they talk to each other.
They use “magic words” that seem to help open their partner instead of shut him or her down.
They use words that keep their partner interested instead of bored.
In any relationship, what we’ve found is that words can wound and words can heal.
We’ve found that the right words truly can make all the difference between whether you stay in love or your relationship becomes a divorce or breakup statistic.
That’s why we’ve put together a collection of the best words you could ever say to your partner if you want to stay in love or even rebuild a love that’s faded over time.
We Call These “Magic Relationship Words”
What if you could know (before it happened) that a tire on the car you were driving was about to have a “blowout” that would be so violent that it caused you to have a wreck?
Would you want to know what was coming before it happened so you could avoid a potentially dangerous wreck?
Of course you would.
But what about your relationship or marriage?
Have you ever said or done something and instantly you just knew that you had pushed someone away?
Have you ever been at a loss for why passion suddenly cooled between the two of you?
Then you may have been using a “passion eraser” without even knowing it..
Passion erasers cause relationship wrecks and if you’re not familiar with this term…
A passion eraser is anything that you think, say or do that reduces or eliminates passion and connection from your relationships and your life.
One of the biggest things that people who get our “Should You Stay or Should You Go?” book and audio program notice about their relationship toward the end is that something has happened to “erase” the passion from their relationship and life.
A passion eraser can certainly be many things and it can even be a belief that holds you back from giving or receiving love.
Most of us don’t take the time to find out what our particular passion erasers are.
But what we know is that we all have to stop using them if we want closer, more connected relationships and happier lives.
Here are a few example of “Passion Erasers”…
*A passion and connection eraser can be small, seemingly insignificant things like interrupting someone consistently while he or she is speaking.
*A passion eraser can be much bigger things like lying or infidelity.
*A passion eraser can be “gotcha,” sarcastic remarks that leave both or you feeling unappreciated and unloved.
*A passion eraser can even be staying in a job that you hate that robs you of your enthusiasm and zest for life.
*A passion eraser can simply be keeping yourself so busy that you don’t have time to connect with those you love.
*A passion eraser can be automatically pulling away when your loved one reaches out to hug you, pull you close, or touch you because you’re “too busy,” “too tired,” or “too” anything.
*A passion eraser can even be when your partner gives you a compliment and you deny that it’s true because you don’t feel good about yourself.
So here’s our question to you…
What’s Your Particular Passion Eraser in Your Relationship? We All Have Them
Here are a few suggestions for identifying yours…
1. Pay attention to your feelings.
Look at them as indicators of what’s going on inside you that you may need to listen to. Do you get a sinking feeling or agitation when you talk about money with your partner or or maybe when you come home from work and see a messy house?
Pay attention and then begin honestly addressing what is nagging at you that you may have been ignoring.
2. Pay attention to your physical symptoms.
One woman wrote to us that she consistently had heart palpitations and her eye twitched when she went to work.
If something like this is happening to you, get checked out by your physician and then take an honest look at how you are dealing with a work or home situation.
What thoughts need to be shifted? What can you do to ease the stress of your situation? Do you have unhealthy expectations of yourself or of others?
3. Begin looking at how you spend your time and if you are spending your time the way you want to–that’s healthy for you–according to your values and not someone else’s rules.
There’s no more powerful passion eraser than living your life according to someone else’s rules and harboring resentments.
An assessment of your time can help you make a conscious decision if you want to keep doing what you are doing.
4. Pay attention to your thoughts and self-talk.
Are you constantly telling yourself negative things about you or others in your life?
If you listen in and pay attention to your self-talk, it can certainly be eye-opening.
What we tell ourselves does tend to manifest in our lives.
Our advice today to you (and to ourselves) is to look at what robs you of passion of all types in your life. Start bringing in more of what brings you passion for living and see how your happiness grows.
Our best, Susie and Otto Collins
From Sarah: Susie and Otto have the relationship, the marriage, and the professional track record to help you get the love you want and deserve using WORDS! We love their book “Magic Relationship Words” – and know it will help you tremendously to communicate your wants and needs -and even what upsets you – with a man in a way that will change the relationship for the better. Just go here to learn how you can create magic in your love life with “Magic Relationship Words”–>>