Sad to say, love and romance aren’t the same for men and women. The things that make US fall in love with certain men aren’t the same things that make THEM fall in love with us! Why don’t men follow our rules?
Today we’ll be talking about the topic of love and romance — and how men and women see it differently.
After several years of studying men and relationships, I could tell you that if men and women followed the same rules in dating, the world would be a much happier place.
Of course, that’s hardly the case!
You know what I’ve realized in the past few years? Most of the break-ups we see today are caused by only two things: misconceptions and miscommunication.
In other words, we simply believe certain dangerous “myths” about men and the way they feel romance.
It’s really sad to see great women — smart, attractive, and confident — accidentally ruin their chances at love and romance simply because of misconceptions. They think certain “dating game” rules are followed by both men and women.
And it’s really sad to see these women lose the men they love simply because of a small bit of mis-communication.
What a shame!
But let’s fix that, shall we? Let’s see three common sources of misconception and mis-communication in dating, relationships and romance, and see how you can avoid them and keep a man interested in you.
The Myths of Love and Romance
Myth #1 — Men Keep Track Of Time.
Here’s perhaps the most common misconception that we have about men — thinking that they keep track of time like we do, especially as a relationship goes by.
Some of us have “deadlines” for our casual relationships to turn out better. Some of us think that a few weeks of regular dating, or a few months, or maybe a year, is “enough time” for a man to get serious and commit to us.
I get a lot of e-mails about this problem — my readers ask me questions like:
“I’ve been dating this guy on and off for two years, but he hasn’t said ‘I love you’ even once. Is he serious?”
“We’ve been dating for six months, and we had sex during the third month. But he still seems to avoid the topic of marriage and settling down. Is he emotionally-unavailable?’
“We have been dating exclusively for years! We have personalities that completely match, and we even have great sex every now and then. How come he’s not proposing yet? Isn’t three years enough for him?”
Ladies, I TOTALLY know how you feel. I’ve been there myself. For me, it wasn’t the man’s indecision that was the worst thing — it was the feeling that I didn’t know what to do or expect. Like you, I thought there was a “deadline” for a commitment to happen.
Unfortunately, things don’t really work that way. Men don’t keep track of time like we do. The only way they’re going to commit to you is if he WANTS to, and when he’s READY to.
That sad thing is that many men get so used to casual dating that they’ll naturally resist any change to it.
So they don’t commit to a more serious relationship. They don’t want to, and they’re not ready to!
By the way, if you want my opinion, you should STILL have a deadline for a guy to commit. The courtship stage isn’t meant to last forever, after all. And to me, a good deadline is one year — it’s enough time for a guy to know you completely.
If he still isn’t ready to commit after a year, then it’s time to leave him, no matter how much you love him. You deserve better, after all. If you want to give him another chance, give him another few months.
Myth #2 — Men Love Funny Women The Most.
Ever notice how we feel emotionally attracted almost immediately to men who can make us laugh?
Or tell great stories?
Or make us learn new things every day?
I think it’s Mother Nature’s way of making sure we end up with the best man for us. Smart men with a great sense of humor often have careers to back up the talk, and so they’re better able to take care of us. They’re more likely to become good husbands and fathers!
The problem is that many of us make the mistake of thinking it’s what MEN want from us, too. So we end up trying to sound smart and funny.
And, of course, we fail miserably!
Here’s a secret — men don’t look for funny or smart women (although those are GREAT qualities to have). They’re looking for sensual women who can awaken their intellectual AND sexual curiosities.
It’s really simple — the more you make a man feel aroused around you, the more he’ll be interested!
But it’s not just the clothes you wear — it’s also about the words you say. It’s such a fun and effective art that I wrote an entire e-book on it! (But more on that later!)
The Most Dangerous Myth of Romance:
Myth #3 — Men Can Be Convinced To Commit.
Last week I came across a hilarious quote — “A man in a shotgun wedding is in a matter of wife or death.”
I’ll admit — I laughed out loud at that quote! And it’s funny, because having a loaded shotgun is probably the only way you’ll ever get a man to commit when he doesn’t want to.
Here’s a lesson we all need to learn over and over — men can’t be begged, convinced, pressured, or bribed into committing to a serious relationship.
No amount of pleading, reasoning, gifts, favors, and even free sex will make him take the leap!
The only way for a man to really wisen up, get serious, and take the relationship to the next level is when he finds a good reason to. He has to WANT a more serious relationship. He’s not going to do something if he doesn’t want to!
And today, the best men only look for women who are smart, attractive, and sensual enough to awaken their “animal side.”
Now if you’ve been reading my articles for a long time, I’m pretty sure you already know enough to know what works and what doesn’t in the dating game.
But like I always say, there’s absolutely NO LIMIT to just how smart, attractive, and sensual you can get. And that’s why I wrote an entire e-book on the topic of being sensual — my readers have been asking for it for a long time!
Called the 77 Secrets of Seduction, this e-book has all the secrets you need to awaken a man’s more secret “primal” side. Once you appeal to this side of him, all the other things — dating, romance, commitment, etc. — become MUCH easier!
From LoveRomanceRelationship: Alexandra is the author of the well-loved book “77 Secrets to Make Him Love You” among others. If you want to see how the 77 Secrets of Seduction can make your man feel YOUR brand of romance, visit her webpage to find out about her book and learn from more of her fabulous advice about love and romance—>>