by Jonathon Aslay
Marriage – The ultimate commitment.
The declaration of love and the desire to spend a lifetime together.
To be in partnership.
To have each others back.
Through thick and thin.
Some of you might be single… “never married”
Others might be divorced and seeking long term commitment.
When it comes to understanding men and the relationships we choose, knowledge is key.
Knowing how we choose marriage (even if you don’t want to remarry), will help you achieve your desired relationship goals.
Men choose long term relationships, the same way they choose saying “will you marry me?”
Let’s face it, times have changed when it comes to how most men view long term commitment.
The old saying “why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?”
It just struck me that this is an old saying, yet in the past (over 60 years ago) most married before the 10th date.
Today relationships can drag out for years before serious talk of commitment is discussed.
Today some relationships feel like a slow death walk.
A waiting game.
Constant doubt if he’s into you.
Walking on eggshells.
Holding back your true heart.
Feeling bottled up inside.
Feeling the need for security.
For most women the need for security can be just as powerful as the biological clock ticking.
Now for some of you, you might be saying: “I never want to get married again”
That’s cool, I get it… divorce sucks.
Have you heard: “The antidote to divorce is never marry in the first place.”
Who cares what others say, what’s most important is what you want.
Companionship is a human need and for some –
The Ultimate Expression Is Marriage
“Ok Jonathon, I get it….how do men choose marriage?”
This past week I was at the gym working out.
I tend to be a bit of a chatter box and love connecting with people.
The gym is great place to make new friends and learn more about human nature.
(yes it’s a great place to meet single eligible men too)
The locker room is my laboratory for understanding men.
It’s all guys in the locker room.
Yes another locker room declaration.
So after getting to know one of the guys while we were at the jacuzzi, we shared our stories.
He’s a doctor, married his high school sweetheart and have been together 26 years.
They dated 8 years before they got married.
So I asked him: “how did you choose your wife?”
He said the following:
We are best friends
We laugh all the time
We have regular intimacy
Actually, he said regular HOT SEX.
When I began writing this post I thought I would change the terms to protect the innocent.
Let’s face it, girls prefer calling it intimacy and guys just call is sex.
When I called him on the sex, he actually confessed they have a strong emotional connection.
This emotional bond led to his true answer of why he chose to get married.
He said that: “when I realized that not having her in my life would be more painful than my fear of commitment, that’s when I made the choice”
Men often fear commitment because it means giving up freedom.
Freedom is just built into our hard-wiring.
Freedom allows us to seek our purpose.
Freedom to conquer the world, allows us to chase YOU.
By contrast, nesting is also built into men.
Men love to nest when they feel content.
By nesting, I mean they are not going anywhere.
When a man is happy in relationship, there is no need to go anywhere else.
Men Commit and Choose Marriage Much Like Workout Buddy in this Story
After interviewing hundreds men and asking them the question, what made you say “you are the one”? they all said the same thing.
We are best friends
We laugh all the time and have fun
We still have the hots for each other
Each man has his own style of relationship that leads to commitment.
Each man has keys to his kingdom.
Before a man even considers marriage or long term relationship, he must choose his relationship.
What do you mean Jonathon, choose his relationship?
There are 7 Types of Relationships Men Choose
Whether you are single & looking or in a relationship, learning these types relationship will save you time and heartache.
When you learn these SEVEN types of relationships, getting to “I do” is much closer than you think.
From The Editors: Jonathon KNOWS the male brain. He coaches women on how to “choose better” when it comes to men, and he has a huge following. We just LOVE him and know you’ll love his free tips, too – so go here to find out how you can move from dating or a relationship to marriage->