by Virginia Feingold Clark

Sometimes the best way to work on yourself is NOT to work on yourself. I mean actually put your priorities aside and fully engage yourself in someone else s life and problems.

Like me, you may have spent countless hours reading self-help books and trying to keep up with the latest advice being presented to us every day by experts. There are so many non-fiction writers with so many wonderful ways to show us ourselves. There are countless exercises to try, lists to write and meditations to experience, all designed to help us know ourselves better and to help us solve our problems.

You may have a coach to help you stay on track and be accountable for your growth. You may go to therapy or meditation groups where you can work on yourself and get insight on how to feel better about yourself. These are wonderful tools, but can also be the source of being stuck as well.

This came to me very clearly recently when I had the experience of helping a family member move from her very stagnant and depressing life on the West Coast across the country to a new beginning. For a period of time, everything I did was focused on her. What would she take, what would she throw away. How to make her limited finances work for her in the best possible way. What she would need to make a new start, and what part of her old life needed to go with her. These decisions were very emotional and important to her and she needed help.

I was so wrapped up in her process that I my mind had the space to take a major vacation from me. My concerns, problems and issues were non-existent for this period of time and I didn t miss them!

In fact, I found that I had a wonderful experience with myself which I fully enjoyed and embraced. The problems that had seemed so pressing and distracting, now appeared easy to handle as I was now seeing them from a new perspective.

I remind my clients often that self-esteem only comes from doing actions that make you proud of yourself. Sometimes helping someone else selflessly can be the best medicine for what ails you.

You can learn more about how Virginia can help you lift your self-esteem and make a huge difference in your love life – her book – “It’s Never Too Late To Marry” is just amazing…check it all out here->

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