by Allana Pratt,
Dear sensational sultry You
Now that I’m getting along well with my son’s father, I just returned from a trip he paid for to Sacramento to meet with a specialist in child development to support our son’s highest evolution.
We literally flew together, drove together… I was open to stay in the same room yet his girlfriend wasn’t (I mean we must have slept together, right? We have a kid.. but I honored her… no worries) and we’re learning SO much to be better co-parents!
This kind of trip would have NEVER happened had I not started forgiving, focusing on the good, letting go of the things that bothered me and moved forward with my power and purpose. He still forgets things and withholds things, yet I am practicing patience and simply not ‘charged’ by things anymore. I’m unwilling to get worked up! Just not worth it!
And my son says it’s better with Dad. In fact he said it was WAY WAY WAY (for about 2 minutes) better with Dad. (And I know it’s because I’m not adding fuel to the fire anymore.
Feeling triumphant that I can love and support my son from afar this way AND whatever DOES occur is between them, empowering the two of them to figure things out, deepening my Faith in Life & knowing if need be, I can step up.
Yet no need to walk around with my shield and sword attracting my fears.)
PART 2 of my healing journey with my coach… Remember when I said we did the most revealing guided meditation I’d ever done that helped me finally let go of the debilitating panicked control I was doing to finally make room for Source to support me?
So, she asked me to focus on all the times I didn’t fulfill a dream, didn’t get to finish something, didn’t complete a project, wasn’t understood, wasn’t heard and supported, in this lifetime or any lifetime… then to scan my body for evidence of this unfulfilled energy.
It was everywhere. It was pukey orange welts all over my body, like a giraffe. When I asked the energy what it needed I began to cry, it was holding so much grief, so many thwarted dreams, incomplete lives, feeling invisible, stifled, cut off, muted.
So from my golden yellow total Highest Self energy, I sensed it needed compassion. It needed to be heard, gotten and tenderly held in its grief so my golden light surrounded each welt and held it.
I sobbed more and my body began to relax, my fight or flight softened, and my coach told me to visualize a baby giraffe, all spotted, and for me to really feel my hands stroking it, petting it, loving it, soothing it.
Then once I said the giraffe felt better and I could see the welts had been enveloped by the golden light of unconditional love, she told me it was time to set the giraffe free. I did… then she told me to notice that I was holding onto the reigns of many horses that I was controlling… she asked how many, 5 or 10?
I said, no, there were well over 100… so she told me to take a deep breath, that they had served their purpose at some point to help you survive, yet for me to thrive they needed to be free, to soar, to co create with Spirit, that I had to let go and Trust… and so I did… tears streaming down my face, breathing deeply as they ran glorious and free through the most stunning meadow at sunset… wind running through their magnificent manes.
She asked me to slowly move forward, to free the shackles around my wrist, ankles, neck, chains dissolving, feeling lighter and lighter with each step as I roamed through this meadow, occasionally a horse coming up to nuzzle me, free, trusting, letting go, moving according to my core intuition and discerning mind, never again to be in my self made prison of control.
I had created a new relationship with God.
I was no longer trying to control everything.
I was no longer living in the self created limited reality where I was 100% in control, terrified to let go, gripping, hardly breathing. I was now free, free of self imposed chains, free of controlling all the horses, free of the welts of unmet dreams, free….
I felt I could sleep for 3 days, I had permanently been in fight or flight, hyper aware… now resting, releasing and time to nourish myself back to fullness, deepening my trust, a toddler in the realm of co-creation with Spirit, a beginning in managing and flowing my full capacity of power and energy.
Since that powerful experience, I am able trust in the unknown, release control of things having to go my way. Clear that if something didn’t unfold as I thought, that I am WAY taken care of and to trust another horse will come nuzzle me in Divine Time.
I am able to decide to manifest something and yet with an unattached journey from A to B. I feel heard by Source and confident this or something better is coming to me. It is rippling into parenthood where I am giving my son more space to show up, to make mistakes, to figure things out for himself all the while holding a loving, present, close space.
I am also letting my clients maneuver their own journeys as well with greater self empowerment, not racing to get them to the finish line, with patience and knowing the goal is done, delighting in the mystery of our partnership.
And finally, while I haven’t looked into the whites of his eye yet, I know my partner is close. I feel rested as if he’s here. Letting go of control feels as though it’s clearing the path to his embrace. Eternal patience yields instant results… and now that my relationship with Spirit has changed and I have let go of controlling every friggen’ detail… I am honestly more at peace in the moment than I’ve ever been, flooded with gratitude, eager to witness the unfolding of this life I GET to live, while humbly savoring this moment, this beauty, this opportunity to profoundly connect.
May you gather courage, support and one pointed focus to enter in the process for yourself to set yourself free. The peace I’m experiencing is beyond words and I had no idea the perma-panic I had been blind to. I want nothing more than for you to have the most deep, profound trust in yourself, in Source and Life.
You are deliciously loved,
Allana is amazing. she’s the only single mom, dating, motherhood and love coach we know who actually shares her own life with you and teaches you how to get the life and love you want. The program she created for us – “Single Mom Manifesto” is filled with practical, spiritual, emotional – and did I say practical? ways to date men in the most effective way and to get and keep the lifelong love you want (or even the “for now” love you want). Go here to check out Single Mom Manifesto, watch Allana’s video, and see how she can help you go from the single women “label” to whatever you want in your love life->