If you want to get your ex to come back, you need to understand the difference between what works and what doesn’t. Don’t get sidetracked by semantics. There are people that will argue that any strategy can be successful given the right circumstances. Technically, that is correct. However, are you interested in technicalities if some strategies work just once in several lifetimes? Chances are you aren’t and that is why we need to clearly divide the different approaches into those that work and those that do not.
Right off the bat, the best approach to take is the one of giving your ex some time and space initially. Remember that regardless of who broke up with whom, your ex is going to need some time to recover. They are going to need time away from you. At this point, if you continue to see them often, you risk alienating them even further and dooming your chances of ever getting back together with them.
Eventually, they’ll get over the breakup. At that point, you can start to build your relationship with them again. It is at this point that the successful strategies can diverge. There is the aggressive strategy and the conservative one from this point.
The aggressive strategy calls for you to really ramp things up and gamble on them not really being committed to the breakup. You can push them a bit harder with the aggressive strategy, but you still need to walk the line in order to make sure that you don’t overdo things. If you do, you risk the strategy backfiring and you losing your ex both as a potential lover and as a potential friend.
Many people are interested in staying friends with their ex even if they can’t get them to come back. If you want to make sure that your ex is your friend even if you can’t get your ex to come back, the conservative strategy is the one for you.
This strategy involves slowly letting the relationship build and then going from good friends to lovers when the opportunity presents itself. Do not push your ex and do not push yourself. You’ve got time as friends that you can treasure until the opportune moment comes.
This strategy is often less successful than the aggressive one at getting back to a romantic relationship, because the opportunities for change are fewer when you’re being conservative. However, it doesn’t have the same blowback potential that the aggressive one has and therefore is better overall for making sure that you maintain some kind of positive relationship with your ex, even if that relationship is non-romantic in nature.
In the end, the decision that you make will have a lot to do with the priorities that you have. If you definitely want your ex back romantically and don’t care about their friendship, you’re more likely to go aggressive. If you want to preserve some kind of relationship with them at all costs, conservative is the obvious choice.
This guy, T.W., has a video on his site about what he calls “The Magic Of Making Up” that explains a lot (I tried to find a picture of him for here – but you can see him in the video – he’s rough but cute)…and his stuff deals with the details – what to do, what to say…check him and the free information he puts out right here->