get back togetherWhat follows may sound incredibly sexist and stereotypical, but that’s not the intent – we just want to give you the information you need to help you get back together with your ex husband or boyfriend.

But, because everybody is different, it would be next to impossible to cover every single possibility – but the generalities actually work surprisingly well.  So, let’s look at how you can patch things up.

While there are no hard and fast statistics, some people have estimated that as many as 3 out of 4 break ups are started by women.

Why is this the case?

Generally speaking, women have a better idea of exactly what they want in a mate; while men are just happy to be with a breathing human being. But the other surprising thing is that it’s normally the woman who wants to get back together, but there’s a catch: if they don’t want to get back together, then nothing will change their mind.

The fact that YOU’RE most likely the “complicated” one – and HE’S fairly SIMPLE makes everything work in your favor and to your advantage.

In Most Cases – Your Man WANTS to Get Back Together

He just wants to feel better about himself, about you and about the relationship than he was feeling when you broke up.

He may have just gotten caught up in the break up – without ever really wanting it.

And though you may have wanted to call it quits – now that you’ve had some time away from him and some time to look around and think about it…you may feel that he’s worth another try.

Understanding the differences between men and women – and the differences between you and your man that caused you to fall apart in the first place – can make all the difference for you.

This will help you to get your ex back. You know that the odds are against you making things work. But the real key is that he needs to feel as though he’s in control.

Your first step is to give him plenty of time and space to work things out on his own. There is a great chance that he will start to miss you, but you need to give him the opportunity to miss you. If you keep calling him and won’t leave him alone, then he will continue being sick of you. Obviously that’s not a smart move.

If You Want to Get Back Together You Have to Break Off All Contact

It won’t be easy, but it’s your safest bet.

You’re going to have a lot of free time now that you’ve broken off contact, but that doesn’t mean you should just sit around. Put this time to good use by figuring out what went wrong. This isn’t as easy as it sounds.

You can’t just look at things that are on the surface. Instead you have to dig down deep and get to the root of the problems that caused the break up. A common reason people give for breaking up is arguing, but if you don’t figure out why the arguments happened, then you will never get back together and stay together.

The next step is to work on solutions for the problems you’ve discovered. One thing to keep in mind is that you can’t change anyone but yourself. So, if there are any problem that relate to your ex, then you need to forget them, forgive them, or confront her about them (the first two are much easier than the last one).

If you want to get back together with your ex, then you need to be willing to do whatever it takes. The above steps won’t always be easy, but they will be worth it when the two of you are happily back together.

From the Editors:  The best book we found – and yes, there are SO many “get him back” books out there – is this one by Michael Webb.  Michael has just been around so long, he’s actually coached so many women, he’s a true expert, and his WRITING is so clear you’ll be able to put his principles into action right now.  To take a look at “Getting Him Back” – go here to learn how to get back together->


  1. E.L on August 11, 2011 at 9:21 am

    this is so annoying. it is all about the man. why would we want to bring someone close that is not acting in a good way with us? why would be want to spend even a second trying to figure out what went wrong? this is so counterproductive for Women..maybe what will sell the book perhaps as so many are caught in the “trying to be nice” mode.

    In the case of someone who disappears without a trace, the best thing you can do is pretend he’s dead and move on! no amount of talking will bring him back as he already decided way before he * “grabbed his coat and scrammed” * that he was ok not ever seeing you again. (“He’s just not that into you- by Greg B and Liz T.)
    I tend to go with Greg’s book more. It is empowering although still difficult to give the guy the “space” you talk about, when all you really want to do is (not get back with him) but go run him over with a big truck!

  2. stacy on August 11, 2011 at 4:25 pm

    How can you cut off all communications when despite you asking him numerous times to not contact you he still does! My ex calls me practically everyday and he is abroad! Its so weird because he gets jealous if he finds out im and talking to other guys and he says things like i shouldnt be so negetive about us because he doesnt see why we cant be together agian in the future. Its as if he wants to keep me close until he is ready for a serious relationship. I love him to bits but i have been pretending to him that i am moving on because i dont knwo when he will be ready so i wont wait any longer(we been broken up 3 months now). He is working abroad but he came back to visit for a week and told me apart from his mom i was the only other person he really wanted to see. But then he told me right now he just doesnt think he can be in a comitted relationship. I dont know how to handle this.

  3. Michelle on August 19, 2011 at 3:57 am

    I agree with EL. Why must women buy all the books and search for everything and do all the work to get a guy back that treats you like crap! All men at some point turns out to be assholes you knew he was going to be in the beginning when he was the sweetest thing on two legs. But NO, we women must do all the work. It’s time we women stand up for ourselves and make them run after US for a change and work their butts off to deserve it!!

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