by Rori Raye
***Here’s a letter from “Want My Soulmate,” who keeps going back and forth – breaking up and making up with a man who can’t commit to her:
I was dating this man recently (for 16 months) that I had dated briefly in high school. He was hurt very deeply in his younger years and has sworn that he would never let his heart go there again.
We had an amazing relationship together. We got along like best friends. We shared so many things in common and needless to say, I fell head over heels in love with him.
The problem: he never shared how he felt about me. I told him a few times that I was in love with him (usually after a few drinks, cause I was too afraid he would reject me and the alcohol gave me courage) but he never said it back.
This made me very insecure with where I stood with him and told him this, but he never did anything about it. I broke up with him three times over this, but never really wanted it over. I just wanted him to see what he had and could possibly lose.
We have not spoken in over 6 weeks and I miss him terribly. He texted me last night, and while the text was not of any importance to us, I still am confused as to why he did it anyway.
How can I get him to come back to me and trust that I would not hurt him or his heart.
I really love him and for the first time in my life, feel like I have truly met my soulmate and I want that back.
Answer From Rori
Breaking up with a man because he’s not committing to you, and then bouncing back to him when you can’t stand the separation, will never work to bring him closer.
Men will call you and text you because they are lonely and miss you in their loves – but it doesn’t mean they want a serious, REAL relationship with you – it just means they don’t want to lose you from their lives.
What this man wants is to have you ON CALL.
We think that if sex isn’t involved, and he calls, he must care.
The truth is, men crave companionship and emotional connection just as much as we do.
They can want to be with us just to be with us, but not enough to COMMIT to being with us.
In other words, they can like us and love us and still not be IN love with us.
It’s hard to tell from your letter if the problem is all his.
Is it possible that your insecurities and need to hear “words of love” from him, and have a real commitment, was creating a “vibe” that pushed him away instead of bringing him close?
When you say you broke up with him not because you were unhappy, but because you wanted to have an effect on HIM, I hear you PRETENDING.
Is it possible that there was actually a LOT of PRETENDING in your relationship?
And that you found it hard to be yourself without, as you tell it, alcoholic fortification?
I’m not asking this to make you wrong – because if this is true – then you can CHANGE THINGS!
If you work with my Tools this minute, and take your focus off of him and really, truly go about seriously falling in love with yourself, and treating yourself with love, affection and attention, you will be putting out a completely different vibe.
And then, when he calls (which he will) you’ll be completely different.
You’ll be talking in feeling messages, doing the “Good Night Talk” from the Toolkit, doing the “Sensual Meditation” right smack in front of him – all the time, and being your real, true, softer self in his presence.
And he will respond to you in a completely different way.
The bonus is – other men will start relating to you differently, too!
You’ll discover it really is “raining men” out there.
Your whole energy will be more positive, you’ll feel happier, and it will rub off on everyone you come in contact with.
Men will want to be around you.
HE WILL want to be around you.
Give it a try and see what happens.
From Sarah – Rori Raye rocks – even her sales pages are amazing, filled with information and help – she goes at this relationship thing and attraction thing in a different way than anyone out there. To learn how you can keep your relationship from breaking up and actually have the relationship of your dreams, go here to get your free Rori Raye newsletters