Some would say that you should not put much energy into a relationship right at the start, you should just go with the flow – but, if the relationship is to be a successful one you should shape it and mold it right from the start.
That way you can see early on out what kind of a relationship it is and what kind it is going to be.
A Successful Relationship Does Not Just Happen
They are successful because they are built on several key factors.
Mutual respect is a very important factor.
Mutual respect for each other tends to lead to trust which is also so important in a relationship.
Love is fickle but if you have the love, respect and trust you are on your way to having a successful relationship.
Relationships that have all these things just make it look easy.
Another way to help define your relationship is to get to know each other so well that you know how the other will react to any given situation at any given moment.
Have you ever heard of the old “Newlywed Game?” (It was one of the really early “reality panel” shows…)
I always liked that show because you could really tell the couples who knew each other and the ones who had a lot of work to do to get to know each other.
I would get a really good feeling about the ones who answered all their questions correctly, you just knew they had a good foundation.
Knowing what the other is thinking doesn’t necessarily mean you have good communication skills.
Although it does help, good communication skills take some time and effort to acquire.
You are not just born with them.
Having and using effective communication skills means you are able to take the other person’s feelings and opinions into consideration without getting angry and lashing out.
Being able to make small decisions well makes it easier when having to make the bigger decisions down the road.
A Truly Good Relationship Will Start With How Good Each Individual Is
I don’t mean good versus bad, I mean how mature, responsible, good communication skills.
If each person brings those attributes to the relationship then the overall relationship will be better more often than not.
You hear all the time that good relationships are made up of good communication skills, but what the heck does that mean?
Does it mean you know how to talk circles around your partner? No, of course not. It means that you can listen to each other with respect, you don’t jump on every little thing that they say and that you learn how to accurately communicate your point without belittling your partner.
Learn to do that and the two of you are on your way to having a good relationship.
We are definitely a society that needs for things to be spelled out and defined.
It just seems to make people more comfortable when things are very clearly spelled out.
When it comes to your relationship it’s important to make sure that you each know what you want and what you don’t want, figuring that out is how you best define your relationship.