by Mimi Tanner
Have you ever had a “relationship” (and I use the term loosely) with a guy like this?
He NEVER calls you. You always are the one to call him.
You wait for him to call you, but he never seems to. So you call him. And when you do, he’s always SO HAPPY to hear from you, and he immediately makes plans with you.
You then feel wonderful, as though everything is just fine. He’s so glad to hear your voice. And you’re going to see him again.
He must have just been very busy.
Or, maybe this is how he normally acts when he’s in a relationship – he almost never calls first, once you start seeing each other regularly.
You tell yourself, “I guess that’s just the way he is.”
But you get OH SO tired of waiting to hear from him.
When you’re with him – he is crazy about you.
When you’re not – you know he LIKES you plenty – but he doesn’t seem to have the need and desire for you that you feel for him!
So you live in a constant state of frustrated waiting. It starts to gets old. The pain is outweighing the happiness. Definitely.
So you finally decide that you’ve had enough of Mr. Hard-to-Reach Who Never Calls First.
HE will have to be the one who gets in touch.
He never does. End of story.
Or is it??
Just when you are finally almost over him, you run into him out of nowhere. OMG, is this meant to be? He seems to think so! It is downright uncanny.
You and he start seeing each other again. It’s better than EVER. (A few things seem odd, but the jury is still out on him…)
In a few weeks, guess what?
Rinse and Repeat! The same thing happens again. He is gone, gone, gone.
Now you know the drill, so you’re not exactly surprised.
Good grief, now you have to get over him all over again. Deja vu. This time, it’s a little easier.
What Was The Background On This Relationship?
When you met, you were both newly divorced. His divorce (his 2nd or 3rd) was especially rough, because his wife took off with his good friend.
If he was never around for her either, you could understand how that could eventually happen.
You couldn’t help thinking about his ex-wife – since her picture was the one picture on his bedroom dresser.
(Not always. Apparently he removed the picture when he knew you were going to be at his apartment.)
He was definitely still in love with her – and not in love with you. Clearly he was going through a very tough time.
Looking back later on, it all makes sense.
In the long run, your romantic emotions for him die out and never return, because the truth is, the relationship never was very close.
By the way, he later marries again. Ouch!! Yes, it does sting that he stuck around someone else long enough to sign papers.
That marriage lasts about a year.
Sometime later, you hear that he has married yet again. By now you feel sorry for the poor, innocent, much younger girl who is his newest wife – or you figure that he’s managed to make things work out with someone before he croaks. Good for him. That’s probably what happened.
You are SO glad that it has been ages since you were imprisoned by your feelings for him. That was not fun.
You’re glad that now you feel nothing for the guy except fondness. After all, he never did anything terrible to you.