by Christian Carter
What is a man thinking when it seems like he’s “into you” at first, but soon after you get intimate with him, he “cools off” and starts acting distant?
How can you tell if it’s too early to sleep with a man?
And what can you do if you’ve ALREADY been physical and now he’s stopped calling for no apparent reason whatsoever?
I received an email from a reader who went through this exact situation. I think you’ll “feel her pain” and see why I wanted to respond to her. This sort of dreadful situation happens with lots of women, and it leaves them feeling helpless and bad about themselves and sometimes about men in general.
So, would you like to know what’s going on with a man in this situation and how to handle it? Keep reading.
Here’s a Question From A Reader:
“Hi Christian I’ve just bought your book and I appreciated it so much. Unfortunately, I read the lesson about Thinking in Time Frames where you taught how to let a man wait for sex. but I’ve already made that mistake and had sex with him. I want a more serious relationship and I told him afterwards, but as you told me he would, he became impatient when we talked and it made me so frustrated and upset.
Now he’s acting distant. So, what should I do to rewire our relationship and make him see my worth? I feel so disappointed about my actions. Christian, please help me. Best regards, J
***My Response I want to give you a big hug. and then a hard dose of REALITY.
Ok, listen closely. Here’s something you NEVER EVER want to forget. It’s the real truth about how most men think when it comes to sex and “dating” in casual and UNCOMMITTED relationships. Ready?
Just because a man has sex with a woman, it doesn’t mean that he’s spent even a second of his time deciding whether or not he wants to be with her or have a relationship in the future.
In other words. a man’s not going to ever “see your worth” just because you’ve slept with him. And more to the point, it is NOT the Physical Attraction a man feels for a woman, and getting close to her physically, that makes a man really “feel it” for you and want more.
Sex does NOT equal a relationship for a man.
In fact, since you don’t seem to be getting what’s going on with men at all. I’m going to tell you that you need to think of sex and relationships as two completely different things which have nothing to do with one another.
What makes a man “see your worth” and end up FEELING so strongly for you that he wants a real relationship is something other than sex and PHYSICAL desire and ATTRACTION. Got it? Ok, good. Here’s the thing. I don’t know if you see this, but you’ve moved on to wanting “something serious” right after you and he had sex- thinking that sex of course means there SHOULD be a relationship and he should feel the same way about you.