by Helena Hart
If you’re questioning whether the love you have with your man is type of love that could last a lifetime, here are the four signs that you need to look for…
1. You both are ready to grow old with each other.
Lust and inferior forms of love are characterized by a “good for now attitude.” Unconditional love means that you both accept that good looks and perfect luck are all tentative. What matters is how well your personalities mesh, how giddy in love you make each other feel, even YEARS after the first time you meet.
The feelings don’t lessen over time.
Your attraction, your desire to have him in your life, only grows as time goes on.
You’re not nuts about growing old (most people aren’t!) but you ACCEPT it and you’re happy that you’ll always have each other, come what may. That’s something beautiful, isn’t it?
2. You both tell each other the darkest of secrets!
Everything about a short-term relationship is shallow…and especially the conversation! On the other hand, telling each other your deepest (and sometimes darkest) secrets is an amazing feeling. Every time you probe deeper, you build trust.
Every time he confides in you something even more personal and unrepeatable, you bond so closely together. He’s telling you stuff he could never tell another soul! It really takes a lot of trust, and yes a lot of unconditional caring about another person, to be so nakedly honest. The more you learn to talk honestly, without a filter, the more you realize you both understand each other better than anyone else.
3. You are proud of who he IS, not who he should be.
So many short-term or doomed relationships happen based on expectations—who they need to be, for this relationship to work. On the other hand, relationships that are real and long-lasting are based on mutual respect and mutual PRIDE.
You’re proud of who he is, what he does accomplish, and even the little things he does that make him unique and heroic in your eyes.
When people feel appreciated in a relationship, they are much happier.
In fact, you’re so happy with each other, you don’t even bother trying to change each other into fitting into a perfect body or perfect set of rules and traits that the ideal husband ought to have (or the ideal wife for that matter). You love him for who he is, just as he loves you. Unconditionally, and always subject to change, because you want to love and support your partner, even if their goals or hobbies change.
4. You always openly communicate, without resentment.
Unconditional love is NOT about letting your partner do whatever he pleases (or him indulging you in every whim). In every relationship, there are boundaries and rules…but these rules are based on the simple desire to make your partner happy and not wanting to cause hurt or grief.
Unconditional love doesn’t mean you allow your partner to do whatever he wants, even if it breaks your heart. A partner who shares the same unconditional love will always put your needs and wants EQUAL to his own.
What really defines a forever loving relationship is not a hedonistic view of desire. Rather, it’s honest communication.
You communicate everything, whether it’s how deeply you love each other, your deepest secrets and most private thoughts, as well as your disagreements. You communicate intimately and consistently, so that no resentment festers. You discuss everything and you always find a way to compromise so that both of you are happy.
You’re more eager to make up and move on beyond this argument, because this is NOT about power in the relationship, or who’s the man/woman in charge. This is about coexisting peacefully. This is something you both want because you have unconditional love in your heart.
In this love, you are free to be yourself. You are free to express yourself and free to feel secure in this relationship. You know what he’s thinking. You know his best qualities and his weaknesses and you accept them. You know him like you know yourself. He recognizes that and so he opens his heart completely to you.
Unconditional love is real. 100% real!
You CAN find it and you can turn a healthy and trusting relationship into an unconditional lifelong commitment. Learn what unconditional love really is, what it FEELS LIKE, and then refocus on meeting better quality guys who exhibit and embody these good qualities.
From Erin at LoveRomanceRelationship: Helena Hart is a superstar in this field. Please check out her powerful program here! <–