datingby Jonathon Aslay

Can we agree that ATTENTION is very important to every relationship?

What am I talking about?

I’m talking about…

Spending quality time together.

Actively listening to one another.

Caring about how each other feels.

Enjoying each others company.

You’re not only lovers, you’re best friends.

Let’s agree that attention feels good.

Just writing that gave me goosebumps.

Yet too much attention can be a turn off, it might come across as needy. Not enough attention can feel empty, it might comes across as uncaring. And the wrong attention can be annoying, it comes across as nagging. There is fine line between too much, not enough or the wrong kind of attention.

And here’s the thing, in my coaching practice women often express the need for quality attention from their guy.

That desire to be received and understood just for who you are.

That desire to have your man look deep into your eyes.

That desire to know he’s truly into you.

Doesn’t it feel good when you have his loving attention?

Guess what? Men like attention too. That’s right, we like attention just as much as you. Men really like the cute text messages. Men like it when you make plans to cook us dinner. Men especially like it when you initiate sex. There is something magical about time and attention for men.

Maybe it’s the feeling of being seen.

Maybe it’s the feeling of being accepted.

Maybe it’s the feeling of being wanted.

Men and women both love attention, I know I do.

Yet many women today feel a lack of attention from their man.

It might be too much time apart. It might be a lack of romance. It might even be less time in the bedroom. Whatever it is, the time and attention might be missing. Nothing is more frustrating when you don’t have your man’s attention.

Now let me tell you, they WANT to give you their attention.

Men want to spend time with YOU.

Men want to make you HAPPY.

Men want to be your HERO.

That’s why attention works both ways.

Attention is one of the languages of LOVE.

Just know, each man has his own formula for the right amount or kind of attention. For some men, having their own space and respecting him for it is one kind. For other men, it might be a variety of shared activities together. Then there are men who enjoy regular sex. Whatever his attention language is, learning this makes you irresistible. Learn his attention language and your guy will feel safe. Speak his attention language and he will feel respected.

Feeling safe is what every man wants. Feeling respected is what every man needs. When men feel safe and respected, they open their hearts to LOVE. It’s true, men will open their HEART.

SECRET #1 to becoming irresistible to any man, learn his attention language.

Now, let’s all take a deep breath for a second.


Can I share something personal?

Come a little closer to the screen.

You’re not going to want to miss this.

Here it is…

The best part of my day is spending time with my beloved, I mean I really love spending time with her. When we are together, we laugh and play. We regularly see our family and friends. We go out on date night every weekend. We give each other our undivided attention. We have passion for one another. And here’s the thing, when she looks into my eyes, I melt. Yes it’s true, I melt and become fully present. I’m irresistibly drawn to her when she gives me her loving attention.

Now let me just say that attention alone didn’t open my heart. In fact, my heart was kinda closed for many years after my divorce. Sure I was dating and meeting fantastic women, but I wanted to be in love.

That feeling of butterflies in my stomach when I saw her. That feeling of being anxious for our next date. That feeling of being able to take on the world. That feeling of being safe and respected. That feeling of opening my heart to love again.

Well, my beloved did it, she OPENED my heart. Like a key that unlocks a closed door, she did it. She knew just how to make me melt, surrendering to LOVE.

In fact, she knew before I did. She did all the right things and she did it with ease.

Let me just say, men want to be in love, they really do.

They just need their heart opened before they let you in.

Wishing you a wonderful weekend.


From Sarah: Jonathon KNOWS the male brain. He coaches women on how to “choose better” when it comes to men, and he has a huge following. We just LOVE him and know you’ll love his free tips, too – so go here to find out how you can succeed at dating->

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